The last couple months have been a blur, with the holidays, lots of new adventures and trying to soak in every moment with my little man. Here is what’s been up the last couple of months.
Excited About // My new role teaching at a small local college. I had moved more into administrative role over the last few years and I LOVED my job at the University. Honestly I really miss my old job and my coworkers, it really was an amazing group of people and students to work with. But after returning after having Cannon, it just didn’t feel right to me. I hated spending so much time away from him when he was so small, it broke my heart and I didn’t feel like I was my best at work or at home. So I resigned from my job without a real plan on what I would do next, it was scary but I believed that something would come up that would be a better fit. In December I applied for a teaching job where I would only have to be on campus twice a week and could do the rest of my work remotely from home. I interviewed and was offered the job right at the begining of the year. While I loved being home full time with Cannon, this for me feels like the best fit, I love that I am with him most days but I still get to teach and interact with adults. It’s not always easy, and there is VERY little free time, but it’s so worth it.
Training For // Marathon training for an April trail marathon. It feels so good to be training for an event, like getting a little piece of myself back.
Focusing On // Little victories. As I have gotten back into training and eating well to fuel my runs I am having little victories like being able to run all the hills on the seven mile loop around my house. Being able to zip up my old favorite running jacket, this is a big win in my book. And fitting back into more and more of my work wardrobe. I hit my pre-pregnancy weight a while ago but after having a baby and (still) nursing things are a little different. I was training for an Ironman before getting pregnant so even if the scale is the same or less body composition is still a work in progress.
Struggling With // Nursing. You may recall that I had a hard time establishing my milk supply right after having Cannon. I had to work really hard to get enough milk to feed him. It was going along but I always had to work at it. I woke up every night for months to pump extra, sometimes multiple times. Now that I am back at work again my supply seems to be going down again and I feel like I am hanging on by a thread to keep up. It’s stressful and I have a lot of mom guilt about it, like I am not doing the right things if I am not able to make enough milk for my baby. I know it’s fine if he has formula, and that I even have a frozen milk stash but I am struggling with accepting that this has been such a struggle.
Loving // Playing with my little man, he is so much fun!